Monday, October 12, 2015

Thai Massage


My husband decided to show his appreciation of me and all I do by booking me a massage. What a sweet gesture! At least that's what I thought...

So I arrived and the massage parlor is gorgeous. Dark hardwood floors and softly lit sparkling chandeliers  Lovely relaxing music is playing and I am given bamboo sandals to wear. Then I am escorted to my "room" which is curtains surrounding a platform bed. I undress warily eying the cracks between the curtains then settle down to await my massage. 

The masseuse asks if I prefer light, medium or hard and I say hard because I've had deep tissue massage in the past and loved them. 

Big mistake. Really BIG mistake. 

First she sat on my back and then proceeded to literally walk all over me. I hadn't noticed the pole and scarf above me that assisted her tightrope act. Heels digging into pressure points over and over. Hurt so good until I finally felt each spot begin to relax. 

As she knelt down and began using her elbows on my spine I briefly wondered how much my husband paid this tiny Thai lady to beat the holy hell out of me. And why did she seem to be enjoying it so much? 

I'd like to say I spoke up and asked her to dial it back to medium or even light, but I didn't want to look like a wimp. So I bit my tongue and endured my pummeling like a champ. I mean, at one point she braced her body against the wall and pressed her feet deep into my shoulders.  She worked my entire body from head to toe for 90 minutes pulling and stretching me into yoga positions that I didn't even know I could do. 

Afterwards I felt stronger and like an incredible amount of blocked energy had been released. I also used a heating pad and sat in the hot tub. Sweet relief. 

I now know what it's like to be completely dominated and at the mercy of my captor. And you know me, I totally tipped her well for the torture. 

The moral of the story is don't say hard unless you mean it! 


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